


eye for an eye

by 2russ



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc
Genre: Angst, Character Study, Child Abuse, Childhood Sexual Abuse, Despair, Gen, Mastermind Togami Byakuya (Dangan Ronpa), POV Second Person, Trans Character, Trans Male Character, Unhealthy Binding, its a vent fic bruh, out of character? absolutely., this is super triggering btw so id avoid it if ur also a survivor, watch me disregard every single canon piece of information about togami as i write this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-10
Updated: 2017-06-10
Packaged: 2018-10-31 13:57:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 751
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10900752
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/2russ/pseuds/2russ
Summary: you will be the best. yes, you will show them all, you will tell them that you are meant to rule them.you are the superior, and you will get it into their thick skulls if you have to crush them under your heel.or, the destruction, rebirth, and reign of togami byakuya.





	eye for an eye

you are born togami sachiko, a beautiful baby girl with tufts of blonde hair and icy blue eyes. no one tells you who your mother is, you don't ask them.

 

your first memory is hate. it is hunger, it is sitting on the dining room floor and seeing your father feast on steak, occasionally kicking you in the stomach with the tip of his boot and laughing when you vomit up stomach acid. you hate him. you hate him, hate him, hate him hate him hate him _hate him hate him hate him hate him hate him hate him_

 

your next is sitting on a bed, your intricate dress, stained with small splatters of blood, splayed around you. you don't know why you can feel something sticky between your legs, or why there are bruises on your arms and chest, or who did this to you, or why something inside of you feels hollow. you don't want to.

 

one night, when you're 12 years old, you sob until your head pounds. it's your fault, isn't it? it's all your fault. yes, yes, you're the reason why this is happening, it's all YOUR fault. because you are weak. yes, that's it, you're pathetic, and pathetic must be punished! yes, you should have figured it out by now! it was right in front of you the whole time! you are weak, and the weak will NEVER survive! nothing, no one in this world has EVER cared for you, so why the HELL were you waiting for someone to love you? you rip all your clothes to shreds that night.

   

the times after that are a blur. you work so hard you don't sleep, lucky to get 50 minutes of sleep every night, to the point where you cannot focus on anything but work work work. you do anything, step on anyone to get to the top. you raise higher than your "siblings", all 13 of them. your body feels heavy all the time, and you find that it's hard to walk. you don't pay it much mind- after all, you deserve it, anyway.

 

when you are 16, you decide to cut all of your hair off with sharp scissors. you start wrapping your breasts up with tape shortly before your 17th birthday. you can see bruises develop on your chest- something about them gives you deja vu. you're obsessed with the ache that comes with it.

 

when you are 17, you meet a boy with brown hair and green eyes. he is the first one to treat you with kindness in your entire life. he kisses you under a blue sky. for the first time, you feel love. you strangle him with a belt in the middle of the night, unable to look away when tears reflectively roll down his face. how pathetic, you think. how absolutely pathetic. you listen to him wheeze and pant for a while, feel the way his body struggles, until he does not. you feel so hopeless, so absolutely miserable, you almost suffocate in the feeling. is this what evil is? yes, it is; you love it, you discover. you are addicted to despair.

  

when you are 19, you are scouted to a high school- the man calls it a school for people like you. you don't hear the rest of his words, because you are absolutely livid, every single neglected emotion rising inside of you. people like you? people like  _you_? nobody there fucking understands what it's like to starve, to have to work their absolute hardest to get a fraction of the way to where they are now, to be taken away from their bedroom with no explanation and then  _used_ when they're barely 6 years old and don't have any idea what's happening to them and they aren't afraid to sleep because they're scared if they close their eyes they'll just see HIM again and they don't understand what it's like to be RUINED-

 

you'll show them. you'll show them what real pain feels like, what they did to you, you'll show them all. you will destroy them like he destroyed you. you will be the best. yes, you will show them all, you will tell them that you are meant to rule them. you are their superior, and you will get it into their thick skulls if you have to crush them under your heel.

 

your name is togami byakuya. you were born to be the best. you will never let them forget it.


End file.
